Marital counseling research finds that it takes 12 positive interactions to
balance out 1 aversive one in a marriage. Research on what works with
juvenile delinquents finds a 4:1 ratio of positives to negatives necessary.
Norman Vincent Peale made a lot of money on the power of positive thinking.
My point? Quit bitchin' so much. Yes, it sucks when you leave all your
Christmas presents overnight on the back seat of your unlocked car in a
high crime neighborhood and some uncaring, larcenous lout steals your whole
Christmas. Yes, crappy waiters suck, but your jeer isn't going to change
one of them into a nice waiter/waitress. Dealing with jeering crapheads all
day tends to cause bad attitudes. Yes, it sucks you stayed with that guy
through all his breakdowns, relapses, trials, etc and now he leaves you for
another co-dependent. Thing is, life in general sucks and it's up to all of
us to start cheering a little more for each other and recognizing that
people who are positive and rise above the suckage need some recognition
too. I love you for reading this.