This is to the man who bashed in my car window to steal a small black nylon
bag. As you found out, it contained three plastic containers that had been
used to feed some stray cats. I hope you enjoyed licking out what was left.
(It was Friskies Ocean Whitefish & Tuna--YUM!) The next time you're hungry,
just leave me a note and I'll put out a big can of dog food for you. (I'll
even throw in a spoon.) And by the way genius, you left your fingerprints,
so you can expect a visit from the police very soon.